Kissing Seth Cohen
If Seth bites his lip one more time while pretending that Pro Skater 4 really is so fascinating, Ryan is going to have a small aneurysm. He's tried being patient, really, he has, but it's not getting him anywhere, and if he keeps waiting for Seth they'll be getting ready for the retirement home before Seth says anything.
For someone who talks so much, Seth can be decidedly mum about certain things, but Ryan has seen the second glances and the flushed cheeks. He would bet a week's salary that Seth wants him, and well, he wants Seth and that's pretty much all there is to it.
If Seth could get himself together and make a move that would make life much better. However, it's painfully obvious that Seth is a virgin, not just in the sexual sense, but in a million other ways that someone as attractive as Seth shouldn't be. It's not Ryan's way of saying Seth should turn into the village slut. Ryan's far too possessive for that, and perhaps he wouldn't feel so overprotective if he didn't understand Seth as well as he does, but that's neither here nor there anymore.
Ryan knows Seth, and he likes what he's seen, but Seth isn't fooling him either. Ryan knows that Seth's extraneous energy and babbling is a cover for Seth's ignorance. Seth is just waiting for the right person to come along and teach him all the things that he should know, that he wants to know and can't figure out how to ask for. Every wild arm gesture and run-on sentence is Seth's way of asking someone to show him how things should be done; that's where Ryan plans to step in.
It doesn't bother Ryan that Summer kissed Seth, he knows it can't possibly have been that good. He's sure that Seth's enthusiasm made up for a lot, but skill could take him even further. Ryan would bet his bike that Seth has had minimal experience kissing anyone and that he probably kisses like the amateur he is. Ryan can correct that. He plans to. It would be a crime against humanity for a mouth like Seth's to go to waste, because Ryan has spent a lot of time watching Seth's mouth move. The words are extraneous; it's those pink lips that really cause Ryan to pay attention to every word that he says.
Ryan watches like a hawk every time Seth chews his cereal or sucks on a piece of candy because he had a rather large masochistic streak, and like all teenage guys he needs decent jerk-off material. Plus, he's just waiting for his chance to slide and see what Seth's capable of, and like most opportunities it appears at the most unlikely moment.
It's just a day like any other. A week before classes are about to begin, and Ryan and Seth are sitting side by side on the living room floor using the Playstation. Pro Skater's not one of the games Ryan is very good at, but Seth enjoys it and that's enough for him. Out of the corner of his eye he watches as Seth yammers and babbles about some skate park that Tony Hawk built and the new skateboard museum in Long Beach. Seth is concentrating with a fierceness that Ryan wouldn't mind seeing diverted elsewhere, and Seth bites his lower lip as he attempts some aerial jump something or other than means nothing to Ryan. Ryan wants to bite Seth's lip, and when Seth "eats pavement" Ryan makes his move.
He's certainly been smoother, but sometimes finesse has to be abandoned to achieve the task at hand. One minute Seth is lamenting his lack of skills into Ryan's ear and the next Ryan's mouth is silencing Seth in the best way he knows how.
It's not a real kiss, just the promise of one: a brush of Ryan's lips against Seth's in a manner that couldn't possibly be construed as anything but what it is. Seth's lips are slightly dry, but they're soft, and Ryan's tongue can't help but flicker out for a brief sweep along Seth's top lip.
Seth tastes like Captain Crunch and toothpaste.
The combination shouldn't be nearly as erotic as Ryan thinks it is, and when he pulls back Seth is staring at him as though he's sprouted another head. Seth's hands are frozen on his game control, and for the first time Ryan considers that perhaps Seth's desire for his approval doesn't stretch quite as far as he thought it did.
He watches carefully as Seth puts down the PlayStation control, reaches up and touches his mouth as though his lips are bruised. The garish punk music from the game makes a very strange soundtrack in the back of Ryan's mind.
"Hey," Seth says, rubbing his bottom lip with his index finger. He looks slightly confused and more than a little wary.
"Hey." Ryan can't ever remember Seth at a loss for words. "Was that okay?"
Seth's smile comes so naturally that Ryan can't help but smile back. "Uh, yeah. Yes. Definitely, yes. In fact if you wanted to do that again, that would not be a bad thing. If you wanted to. But you don't have to –"
Only Seth could give the impression of rocking back and forth without moving at all, and as annoying and endearing and several other things as Seth's babbling is, Ryan can think of much better things for Seth to do with his mouth.
"You talk a lot," Ryan says, leaning forward again, only to bump noses with Seth when he tries to swoop in at the same time.
Seth pulls back looking suitably embarrassed, but before he can go far Ryan's holding a fistful of his favorite 78 shirt and keeping him within close proximity.
Ryan only misses Seth when he moves far away.
"It's not a race," he says softly. "Just relax."
The look of nonplussed terror on Seth's face makes Ryan's lips twitch in amusement. "You're not going to get it wrong, Seth," he says, letting go of Seth's shirt and lazily smoothing out the wrinkles he's created. Any excuse to stroke Seth works for him.
Seth's eyes dart down to where Ryan is touching him, and it's not Ryan's imagination that Seth's heartbeat is racing.
Seth blinks. "But—"
"Close your eyes."
Seth's hesitation is evident, but after several seconds his eyelashes flutter closed, and Ryan takes a moment to appreciate the kind of innocence that he's never had. With Seth waiting, it's a short moment, and Ryan leans forward and brushes his mouth against Seth's again, not looking for anything but contact. The press of Seth's slightly dry lips is welcome without being overbearing like Gabrielle's slick lipstick; the kisses are miles apart like Chino and Newport.
Once again it's just the hint of a kiss, and when Seth's lips part slightly Ryan ignores them. He plants small kisses at the corner of Seth's mouth and nips Seth's bottom lip instead. Every kiss Ryan gives is a tease, and he pulls away fractionally to gauge the reaction to his ministrations. He can feel suppressed emotions rumbling around in his stomach and in his head like numbers at Bingo, but the only outward change is a slight dampening of his palms.
He rubs his hands on his jeans absently while studying Seth's parted lips. His eyes are squeezed closed as though he's refusing to allow the merest hint of light to penetrate his lids. The need to smirk comes from somewhere deep inside Ryan; he's been in Seth's place before and the frustration must be driving him insane.
Ryan licks his lips once, twice, and then leans in, closing his eyes and his mind against anything that isn't Seth, or Seth-related.
This time Ryan forgoes the gentle approach for raw need. His lips press against Seth's in demand, and he sweeps his tongue into Seth's mouth urging Seth to come out and play. The rumbling in Ryan's stomach has solidified into a slow burn moving throughout his body, spreading heat as though he's just gotten feeling back in numb limbs after being still for too long. The pins and needles follow in turn, and Ryan's hands itch for bare skin and to move faster than they should when Seth is slow to respond.
Ryan's nails dig into his palms, and he changes his angle slightly, opening his mouth a little bit wider. He's not trying to swallow Seth whole, he just wants to taste him over and over and over. If it were almost anybody else, anywhere else, Ryan wouldn't care about doing this right, but he does care and that makes all the difference.
Finally Seth's tongue ventures out shyly, and he moans piteously in the back of his throat, which Ryan takes as encouragement, and his kisses become more aggressive. He pulls away only to dive back in, his tongue sliding between Seth's lips in a suggestive manner. The kisses aren't all that wet, but they're dirty as sin, and Seth wobbles slightly as Ryan urges him to tilt his head in one direction. Ryan's hand cups the back of Seth's head to hold him steady, and his fingers catch in sleep-tangled black curls. The feel of Seth's skin is like cold water after too long in the sun, and Ryan can't help but splay his fingers out and stroke as much as possible. It would be so easy to slide his free hand under Seth's shirt and touch tan skin, but Ryan stops himself by digging his nails into his palm again, and then stopping. He has to relax like he told Seth.
He pulls away to breathe and nips lightly at Seth's jaw when Seth's mouth stays open and waiting, gasping for air. Just the way Ryan wants him.
Ryan spends several seconds just staring, his fingers rubbing a soothing pattern against Seth's scalp and eventually Seth's eyes creep open as though he's hoping that Ryan won't catch him peeking.
A smile twitches at Ryan's lips when Seth's eyes meet his own.
"Not peeking. Not looking at all," Seth says immediately, shutting his eyes again without prompting. He even reaches up and covers his eyes with his hands briefly. "Eyes closed just like you said."
Ryan's laugh is low. He gently extracts his fingers from Seth's hair and slowly drags the flat of his hand along the slope of Seth's neck, until he's cupping Seth's jaw in his hand and the tips of his fingers are hooked behind Seth's left ear. Seth's skin isn't just cold water anymore. Now it's also the soft cotton shirts and well worn jeans that comfort Ryan when everything else is new and strange and scratchy.
Seth's skin, like Seth, is a soothing drug, and Ryan is hooked.
He uses the lightest touches to guide Seth's mouth back to his, urging Seth to participate, and he feels a small frisson of pride when his eyes close, and Seth's lips touch his first. Seth's kisses are tentative, but he's eager, and he presses forward until Ryan has to let go of Seth's face to prop himself up on his elbows. Ryan tilts his head up expectantly, letting Seth come to him and set the pace, and he lounges on the floor casually as Seth keeps kissing him. Some of the kisses are small and some are not. Every now and then Ryan will shift his weight to reach up and correct Seth's movements or to move Seth's head so he can kiss his neck.
When Seth pulls away to breathe, Ryan takes over, and when the kisses become too wet Ryan pulls away slightly, forcing Seth to change tactics. Somewhere along the line Seth shifts so that he's pretty much blanketing Ryan's body, but without actually touching him at all, as though he's afraid to because Ryan hasn't told him what to do. Ryan likes that. He knows all he would have to do is reach up and pull Seth around him, but he won't because that's not what this is about.
Ryan's in no hurry to change the status of Seth's virginity; this leisurely kissing suits him just fine, and he puts his hand over Seth's when he feels fumbling fingers at the hem of his shirt.
"Relax," he whispers against Seth's lips. "I'm not going anywhere."
A pause in activity makes Ryan open his eyes to see Seth watching him uncertainly. "Do you like not want me, because I –"
Ryan pushes himself up quickly enough that their teeth clack together, and his mouth silences whatever self-deprecating remark Seth was going to make.
Ryan kisses Seth fiercely, with the kind of possessiveness that he's never felt for anyone, knowing that they might be taken away. Seth though, Seth isn't going anywhere; Ryan has this belief that someone more optimistic might call 'hope.' This kiss speaks of their future, and Ryan's tongue sweeps through Seth's mouth brushing away as many sarcastic remarks as possible.
By the time he pulls away they're both panting.
Seth's mouth is wet and his lips are swollen; his eyes take almost a full minute to open. He stares at Ryan as though Ryan's just popped out of one of his comic books, but he's unnaturally silent, at least for him.
"Okay?" Ryan says.
Seth just nods and closes his eyes expectantly.
Ryan's lips are a breath away when he hears the faint slam of a car door. He instantly pulls back, and Seth's eyes fly open at the sound of a key scraping at the lock on the front door.
Seth looks completely stunned, but he quickly scrambles back a respectable distance and stammers out something that might be "hey" at his father's greeting. Ryan, at least, returns the hello as Sandy's footsteps carry him to the confines of the kitchen.
Ryan licks suddenly dry lips as Seth gazes at him with a suitably glazed expression, and he ill-advisedly brushes his fingers against Seth's mouth before gesturing to the neglected game control on the floor.
"How about we play another game?" he asks picking up his control.
Seth shakes his head and clears his throat. His voice cracks slightly. "Something a little faster?"
Ryan smiles. "No, this speed is just fine."