Dèj´ You?
She woke up slowly, and the steady drumbeat of pain between her eyes made her wish she hadn't. Damned Vegas. Damned tequila She yawned--wincing again as she did so--and turned to her right, where a tall, dark-haired man wearing very little clothing was sleeping quietly. She glanced down, noticed that she was in a similar state of undress, and sighed. Hope no one got pictures--this kind of thing is always embarrassing when it gets out She smiled slightly, then leaned down and nudged him as she called out softly, "Hey, you. Time to wake up and face the hangover."
The man stirred, then opened his eyes and sat up, wincing and muttering, "Damned tequila," as he did. She smiled at the reaction, and the man turned to her and managed a shy smile, asking hesitantly, "This is a bit embarrassing, but did we--?"
"We seem pretty naked--I don't think we spent the night shooting craps," she snickered, and the man nodded. She studied his face carefully and frowned as she tried to remember where she had met him: "You were at a convention at the MGM Grand, right? You were there as a guest speaker about--"
"Too early in the morning to be talking about that, even for me." The man glanced down on the floor, spotted his pants, and pulled them on, modestly turning his back to her as he did so. He turned back to see her smiling at him, and he frowned as he tried to place her. "Have we ever met before last night? You seem--"
"Keep thinking--it'll come to you." This didn't happen to her often, but it always amused her when it did. She pulled on a T-shirt and shorts lying at the foot of the bed, then spotted a pitcher of water sitting on a table across the room. "Come on--we can sort things out over some water--always nice when you've got a hangover."
The man nodded in agreement, and they walked over to the table together, his arm casually around her waist in an unconscious gesture. She enjoyed the comfortable sense he was giving her as they reached the table and he reached for the pitcher--only to stop in mid- gesture and stare in horror at an inoffensive looking sheet of paper lying on the tabletop. She looked over at him and nudged him, asking, "Are you all right?"
He shook his head and inclined his head at the paper as he whispered, "Well--now I know why you looked familiar."
She looked down and stared at the single sheet of paper--it had been a year, but she recognized the document immediately. She turned to the man next to her, and they were as pale as ghosts as they both howled at the top of their lungs:
"NOT AGAIN!"
It would be hours before they could bring themselves to look at it again--minus all of the usual boilerplate, it read as follows:
Marriage License:
Ross Geller
and
Britney Spears
January 1, 2005
Las Vegas, Nevada