Just Add Water
by Kaite

"There were only four witches in all the land of Oz, and two of them, those who live in the North and South, are good witches. I know this is true, for I am one of them myself, and cannot be mistaken."
- The Good Witch of the North, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, L Frank Baum

"`When in the provinces', she said, `you have to show them a little style.'"
- Glinda, Wicked, Gregory Maguire

Since arriving in Oz, Dorothy has killed two witches. One by accident, true, and one because someone told her to. Still, Glinda isn't taking any chances. The ruby slippers are dangerous magic, you can see it in the way they glisten darkly as the sunlight hits them, but Dorothy is a girl, and girls like pretty, sparkly things. When Glinda drifted onto the scene in her bubble, it never occurred to her that beneath the layers of gauze and glitter lay a will of iron. All she saw was a fairy godmother, complete with wand. A little girl, dazzled by colours, is the easiest thing in the world to manipulate. All she wants is the route back to Kansas, and the Yellow Brick Road to the City of Emeralds will do. The Great and Terrible Oz inspires awe in all who meet him -- bread and circuses should do the trick with this unsophisticated little thing and her friends. It isn't just the straw man who lacks brains, they're all as stupid as each other. They believe people keep their promises. They never read the small print, and for that Glinda is thankful. Dorothy clicks her heels three times and vanishes -- where else could she have gone but Kansas? In truth, she could have gone anywhere, she isn't sure where exactly, only that it isn't there. She came here from Kansas once, and she could do it again. The important thing is that she and her witch-killing habits are safely away from Glinda.

The Witch of the West and all her beautiful wickedness are in a puddle in her castle floor and her sister is a pile of dust underneath a farmhouse in Munchkinland, already a tourist attraction. But Glinda the Good Witch of the North is still flesh and blood, and intent on getting home before it starts to rain.

 

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