Symbiosis
by Dana Woods

Kaylee likes swings. Mal knew she would long before he led her through tents and stalls and tables full of fei oo that made her eyes light up something fierce. The swings are why he coaxed her off Serenity. And it did take coaxing. Kaylee's been like a skittish animal lately. Started after the Niska fiasco, got worse after Early came looking for River.

There are shadows and guilt in little Kaylee's eyes now, and Mal knows a thing or two about such things, because when he looks in a mirror his eyes are dark and hazy from them. He knows they'll be there forever, and there ain't a thing he can do about them. Got as many pitfalls as it has perks, this life they lead. And as much as Mal wishes he could have kept Kaylee away from the things that bring shadows and guilt, he knows it's been inevitable ever since he walked into the engine room and saw those legs of hers around that gorram useless mechanic's waist.

Sometimes he thinks it's like a disease and he's infecting the crew. Taking all the shadows and guilt from the war, exposing them to it all, and sullying them like trash.

"Push me?" Kaylee pleads, and Mal gives her a little nudge towards the swing.

"High or low, bao bei?"

She settles down on the slat of metal and grips the chains in her small hands, grinning that mile-wide grin of hers. "High as you can make me go, Captain."

Mal steps up behind her, taking hold of the seat and leaning down to set his chin on her shoulder. "I can get you going pretty high. Reckon you can handle it?"

Kaylee turns her head and kisses his cheek, her lips smacking together loudly. "Do your worst."

Wash catches up to them a little while later. Leans against a tree and refuses to take over when Mal's arms start demanding a break.

"Is there gonna be crime?" Kaylee asks as she swings back towards Mal.

"Yes," Wash pipes in, "fill us in on the next illicit scheme, oh wise and terrible leader. Do I get to dress up again? Because I've been thinking about it, and I'm almost sure I can pull off a dance hall girl." He extends one of his legs and sets a hand on his hip. "With the proper incentive, of course. But I've definitely got the legs for it."

Mal feels his eyes flutter a bit, not quite rolling and not quite bugging.

"Inara could lend you an outfit," Kaylee suggests on her next descent and keeps talking as Mal gives her another push. "We could get you a hat. Maybe that bonnet the Captain used that one time. And River could help you with some dancing moves. You'd be real authentic-like."

"There will be no crime today, children," Mal says, forestalling whatever Wash was going to say. "This is a pit stop, nothing more. Won't be anything going on until we hit Persephone again."

Kaylee makes a strangled noise and Mal frowns at her back. Wash is in front of her, and he grimaces at whatever he sees on her face.

"Uh, you might want to get her off there, Captain. I told her that meat product looked a little off-putting."

"Hwoon dahn," Mal growls and grabs at the chains when Kaylee comes into reach.

She's clutching at her stomach and moaning, and her face is pale and sweaty when he finally gets the swing to stop and helps her off. "I don't feel so good."

Mal sits her on a bench and sends Wash off for something that might settle her stomach a bit. Her head is between her knees and she's taking deep breaths. Mal shakes his head and rubs her back.

"How you doing?" he asks ten minutes later.

"Terrible," she mutters. "I ruined your only planetside day in weeks."

Mal smiles. "Didn't ruin anything. Up until the threat of vomit came into the picture, it was a mighty fine day. Got to spend it showing a pretty girl the sights of this here rock and pushing her on the swings, didn't I?"

Kaylee giggles, her head turning to the side so that she can peer up at him. She's still a little green around the edges, but Mal's not so worried about his boots getting dirtied anymore. She opens her mouth to say something, and then wrinkles her nose and apparently changes her mind.

"You look so handsome in the sun, Captain. Your eyes are all bright and sparkly."

So are Kaylee's, but Mal doesn't think it has much to do with the sun for either of them.

 

Wash comes back with some tepid ginger tea for Kaylee and it does the trick. They wind their way through the market on their way back to Serenity, Kaylee studiously avoiding any and all food stalls, but gravitating to trinkets and figurines.

Ever the impatient one, Mal strides ahead of them, looking back every so often to glare them into movement when they dawdle.

If there's anyone on Serenity who Wash feels a kinship with, it's Kaylee. He knows everyone thinks she's the sweet, darling girl. The heart. And she is, but Wash and Kaylee are the ones who get left on ship when there's crime afoot. They've spent hours together, whiling away the time waiting for the others to get back.

Kaylee's not the naïve little thing it's easy to think she is. She's got a heart of gold, yeah, but she's got a whole lot of practical, real world truth in her, too. She knows about the bad, but she doesn't let go of the good.

She's been beating herself up for months, now. She feels like she dropped the ball with Niska and Early. Wash feels like he dropped the ball with Niska, too. Didn't stay strong enough, even with Mal's help. Broke a dozen times over and it was only because of Mal that Niska didn't notice and exploit it.

Big damn heroes, all but him and Kaylee. That's how Wash figures it looks to others. But to him it's more like: big damn heroes, all but him. Because Wash decided a while ago that there's a big bit of heroism in the way Kaylee should have crumbled so many times, but didn't.

"I think it's shiny," Kaylee tells Wash, holding up something made of twisted metal forks and spoons, the likes of which weren't hardly used anymore. "Think River'll like it?"

Wash studies the...sculpture?...figure?...thing. The sunlight glints off the disjointed surface, shooting little spots of pain through Wash's eyes and right to his brain.

"It's disturbing and sharp and it's slightly painful to contemplate. You'll be her hero," he decides.

"Naw, Simon's her hero," Kaylee says as she purchases the thing. "No one'll ever be better 'an him in her eyes."

She links her arm through his and starts tugging him to the left. Her gaze is fixed firmly on something frilly and frou-frouish and a frightening shade of lime green. Wash thinks it might be a skirt, but he's not sure. It could also possibly be a blanket that people who visited that same food stand Kaylee did, but were less lucky, used to empty their stomachs on. It's hard to tell.

"Hey!" Mal calls out sharply, and they stop and look at him. "Do I need to tether the two of you to me? Let's go."

Mal's glare is fierce and dangerous, and Wash widens his eyes innocently while Kaylee laughs. "Sorry, Captain. We won't wander no more, I swear. Go on, keep leading us."

"Look at the way he walks," Wash says a few minutes later, watching Mal's back. "It's like he owns the planet. How does he do it?"

"It's a Captain thing," Kaylee says somberly, her eyes twinkling. "And a Zoe thing. Oh, and a Jayne thing. But...that's Jayne. He probably thinks he does own the planet; he's not quite right."

"I want to own a planet like that," Wash complains. "My walk sends the, 'I'm a renter who hasn't paid up in a while and is about to get evicted' message."

Wash looks down at Kaylee to share the joke, but she's looking at him oddly, her head tilted to the side and her eyes wide.

"Not always, it doesn't," she tells him quietly. "You went back in there, Wash." He knows she's talking about Niska. It's one of the few things that gets talked about without really being mentioned. "After everything that happened. That takes a walk, you know."

Wash thinks it makes a weird kind of sense, the likes of which Kaylee's infamous for in his mind. "Kind of like how you didn't stay on the floor of the engine room, I think."

There's a flash of pain and guilt, and then a surprised blink, before Kaylee shrugs awkwardly. "Sometimes I don't know what I'm talking about. Come on, we're lagging and the Captain's got that twitch in his hand. Don't want him shooting at us, do we?"

Sometimes, Kaylee knows exactly what she's talking about. Wash learned that about her during a two day period when they were babysitting Serenity and everyone else was off doing something thrilling and exciting.

"Let's walk the walk, tiny mechanic woman," Wash suggests with a grin, and she starts. Then her eyes narrow a bit and she smiles. She slides her hand down his arm to take hold of his.

Mal rolls his eyes when they flounce and flutter their way to him, breaks them apart and reminds them that they've got a schedule to keep to.

 

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