by Claire

You've heard them whispering about you. They think you can't hear them -- or perhaps they just don't care whether you hear or not. Maybe they don't realise that in this house at the moment, as crowded and cramped as it is, there are no secrets. No privacy, no personal space, just too many people living together under one roof and it's driving everyone, including you, crazy.

The other potentials whisper that you're too arrogant, too bossy, a spoiled brat who's used to getting her own way. You admit that the brat part is probably true. The bossy part isn't. Not really. You just want to have a say. You want to help them prepare, to be ready. You're ready. And they don't get it. Despite all the training and Buffy's motivational little speeches, they don't get it.

Buffy and Xander and Dawn whisper about you and Willow. They think you came on too strong, think that you're too pushy, think that she needs more time to get over Tara. You wonder if they even get it. Buffy and her speeches -- and yet she doesn't seem to understand that this time might be all there is. They might lose. And if they lose -- that's it.

All they have is now, and no one seems to get that this is not the time for playing nice and taking things slowly.

You'd be going seriously, truly, utterly insane in this place if it wasn't for Willow. Oh, they don't get it. They probably don't even know what she sees in you. Sometimes you don't even know; you just know that she wants you as much as you want her, and that's enough for you right now.

You hear them whispering about you.

And you don't give a damn.


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